Q - I would like to share something with the group about manifestations and believing in your dreams. When I was a small child I was very poor, cold and sad but I used to make up images and dreams of my dream house to make me feel happy. I truly believed that one day I would be living in a beautiful house with a balcony and a sea view. Well many years later I moved across the world to Australia and I now live in that house with a view and three balconies and every day I am very grateful! So I want everyone to believe they too can have/ live their dreams! Anything is possible. - Alison, Australia
Dana's response: Thanks Alison, what a great story! It is so true, anything is possible.
www.danamrkich.com
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Where is my soulmate? Is my manifesting not working?
Q - I've been living a very solitary life lately, and it's one that I'm completely over!!! But no matter what I try, I just don't seem to be able to bring my 'new life' any closer. For me it feels like I'm in a holding pattern. I've meditated on it, journal daily on it, created a gratitude journal specifically for it, even learnt about writing 'soul prayers' (as Robert Ohotto puts it!!!), but nothing seems to change. Even when I realize I'm trying too hard and that the frustration is pulling me away from positive thoughts, I let go and allow fate to take its course.... still nothing happens!!!! In choosing to participate in your course, I wanted to learn more about manifestation, but its taught me so much more, its been a wonderful (and emotional) journey of self discovery. My only hope is that by the end of it, the universe will see that I am trying to put myself in the best possible position to receive this 'new life' I'm often told about, and finally, it will allow me the pleasure of having Divine Timing on my side!!! - Mandy, Australia
Dana's Response: In my experience, the Law of Attraction is real, but it is only a response to your Vibrational Reality which consists of so much more; old energies, hidden aspects, beliefs, higher plans, fears, soul cellular memory, inherited ancestral cellular memory, surrendering to your co-creators, divine timing etc -There are so many things involved in creating and manifesting, and it's to our benefit to be aware of as many of them as possible. Don't feel that you still have 'blocks' to uncover, or that there is something you are not getting. While it seems inconceivable to us, especially when we have a strong desire about something in particular, it may be that your soul actually wants the solitary experience you are now having, knowing it is not forever, or that even though you are ready, your future partner is not quite there yet.
If you have a strong feeling that there is a soulmate out there for you, there is. And yes, Diving Timing plays a big part. I remember a Yogi in India telling me that my soulmate was 4 years away at least. I was 26 and thought I was ready!! I remember thinking, there is no way I'm waiting that long!! Well, it was actually 8 years before the Divine brought Christian and I back together, I was 34. We had dated when I was 19/20 and never, ever, had it occurred to me that he would waltz back in my life, nor did I have any clue he'd turn out to be the one. There is a book by Arielle Ford, who finally met her soulmate in her 40's, called Hot Chocolate for the Soul: 101 Stories of Soulmates Re-Uniting. It reminds you that soulmates are always, always, re-united. I believe this more than ever in these times when everything is being turned right side up, finally. Also just because you aren't seeing anything happening, doesn't mean that 'nothing' is happening. Did you know that 98% of creation has happened before we see it manifest physically? Just know he is coming, believe he is coming, act as if he is coming, and in the meantime celebrate this time with yourself, knowing that you are nearing the end of your 'single' life, and that it is something to enjoy the last moments of. See yourself as if you are in your new life right now, just knowing that he who is right for you will come to you.
www.danamrkich.com
Dana's Response: In my experience, the Law of Attraction is real, but it is only a response to your Vibrational Reality which consists of so much more; old energies, hidden aspects, beliefs, higher plans, fears, soul cellular memory, inherited ancestral cellular memory, surrendering to your co-creators, divine timing etc -There are so many things involved in creating and manifesting, and it's to our benefit to be aware of as many of them as possible. Don't feel that you still have 'blocks' to uncover, or that there is something you are not getting. While it seems inconceivable to us, especially when we have a strong desire about something in particular, it may be that your soul actually wants the solitary experience you are now having, knowing it is not forever, or that even though you are ready, your future partner is not quite there yet.
If you have a strong feeling that there is a soulmate out there for you, there is. And yes, Diving Timing plays a big part. I remember a Yogi in India telling me that my soulmate was 4 years away at least. I was 26 and thought I was ready!! I remember thinking, there is no way I'm waiting that long!! Well, it was actually 8 years before the Divine brought Christian and I back together, I was 34. We had dated when I was 19/20 and never, ever, had it occurred to me that he would waltz back in my life, nor did I have any clue he'd turn out to be the one. There is a book by Arielle Ford, who finally met her soulmate in her 40's, called Hot Chocolate for the Soul: 101 Stories of Soulmates Re-Uniting. It reminds you that soulmates are always, always, re-united. I believe this more than ever in these times when everything is being turned right side up, finally. Also just because you aren't seeing anything happening, doesn't mean that 'nothing' is happening. Did you know that 98% of creation has happened before we see it manifest physically? Just know he is coming, believe he is coming, act as if he is coming, and in the meantime celebrate this time with yourself, knowing that you are nearing the end of your 'single' life, and that it is something to enjoy the last moments of. See yourself as if you are in your new life right now, just knowing that he who is right for you will come to you.
www.danamrkich.com
How do I know I'm on the right path?
Q - I liked the quote in your course "Your authentic self is the part of you going with the flow. Your ego is the part of you going against this flow, resisting with fear, doubt and worry...." This certainly epitomises the struggle to uncover the inner truth with self doubt. Perhaps you could talk about the signposts to make sure you pick up the right path, career, learning experience, dream. It seems too subtle so it is easy to miss or not trust the signs. I think there are ways to polish the antenna to increase the receptivity. Can you discuss the recipe for this too. Alice - Australia
Dana's response: The most important thing is to follow your feelings. As many of you know Christian and I spent 16 months travelling recently. We had such a strong feeling to pack everything up and go, even while financially we started out with enough funds for perhaps 5 months. Everyday felt wonderful, and abundance continued to flow when we needed it, and so we took that as a sign that we were on the right path. If it had ever stopped feeling wonderful, or if we found ourselves in dire straits financially with no response to our prayers, we would have taken that as a sign to head back to Sydney. We have definitely had moments of being with $0, and made very clear requests to the Universe, letting go of our ego's and outcome, praying: "If we are meant to keep travelling, show us the money! Otherwise we'll take it as a sign that we need to be in Sydney right now." The thought of ending the trip early felt really 'heavy', (when we left our pendulum swung to 15 months to indicate how long we'd be gone) it didn't feel right at all to cut the trip short, yet in our moment of prayer we would always allow for the knowing that the Creator and our Higher Selves knew better than we did as to where we were meant to be. Every single time, without exception, abundance has come in the large quantities we needed.
Following your feelings can also involve surrendering to a higher plan. I have shared the story in one of my recent Monthly Visions about how once I got into a Masters degree in London, yet every time I even thought about booking the plane ticket I got a 'heavy' feeling, as if my body was being forced to go where it didn't want to go. I knew this wasn't about fear of living over there, I had just come back from a year of living over there and absolutely loved it. I couldn't wait to get back! Yet my body completely tensed up at the thought of buying the planet ticket. So I kept postponing the degree, and eventually said to the Universe: "Okay, if I am not meant to go, if I am meant to stay here, show me why!" Soon after that various work opportunities opened up and about 6 months later I was re-united with Christian who I hadn't seen in 14 years. Always trust how your body feels about something.
Finally, let go of what other people think about you and your life. Thankfully we have a circle of incredibly supportive friends and family around us who all believe in following your dreams. Yet there are maybe one or two well-meaning 'old school' people who don't understand what we are doing or why, and thought we'd be better off in Sydney with 'real' jobs. The thought of that is so constricting and it wouldn't cross our mind to follow that advice, yet many people do follow advice like that taking on other people's fears and beliefs about life. Always remember that people only have the GPS and Soul Manual for their life, not yours. You are the only one who knows what is right for you. A combination of following your feelings, while also surrendering to your co-creator's - your higher self and the Creator - will always guide you in the right direction.
http://www.danamrkich.com/
Dana's response: The most important thing is to follow your feelings. As many of you know Christian and I spent 16 months travelling recently. We had such a strong feeling to pack everything up and go, even while financially we started out with enough funds for perhaps 5 months. Everyday felt wonderful, and abundance continued to flow when we needed it, and so we took that as a sign that we were on the right path. If it had ever stopped feeling wonderful, or if we found ourselves in dire straits financially with no response to our prayers, we would have taken that as a sign to head back to Sydney. We have definitely had moments of being with $0, and made very clear requests to the Universe, letting go of our ego's and outcome, praying: "If we are meant to keep travelling, show us the money! Otherwise we'll take it as a sign that we need to be in Sydney right now." The thought of ending the trip early felt really 'heavy', (when we left our pendulum swung to 15 months to indicate how long we'd be gone) it didn't feel right at all to cut the trip short, yet in our moment of prayer we would always allow for the knowing that the Creator and our Higher Selves knew better than we did as to where we were meant to be. Every single time, without exception, abundance has come in the large quantities we needed.
Following your feelings can also involve surrendering to a higher plan. I have shared the story in one of my recent Monthly Visions about how once I got into a Masters degree in London, yet every time I even thought about booking the plane ticket I got a 'heavy' feeling, as if my body was being forced to go where it didn't want to go. I knew this wasn't about fear of living over there, I had just come back from a year of living over there and absolutely loved it. I couldn't wait to get back! Yet my body completely tensed up at the thought of buying the planet ticket. So I kept postponing the degree, and eventually said to the Universe: "Okay, if I am not meant to go, if I am meant to stay here, show me why!" Soon after that various work opportunities opened up and about 6 months later I was re-united with Christian who I hadn't seen in 14 years. Always trust how your body feels about something.
Finally, let go of what other people think about you and your life. Thankfully we have a circle of incredibly supportive friends and family around us who all believe in following your dreams. Yet there are maybe one or two well-meaning 'old school' people who don't understand what we are doing or why, and thought we'd be better off in Sydney with 'real' jobs. The thought of that is so constricting and it wouldn't cross our mind to follow that advice, yet many people do follow advice like that taking on other people's fears and beliefs about life. Always remember that people only have the GPS and Soul Manual for their life, not yours. You are the only one who knows what is right for you. A combination of following your feelings, while also surrendering to your co-creator's - your higher self and the Creator - will always guide you in the right direction.
http://www.danamrkich.com/
I feel stuck, I think I'm in a cosmic static!
Q - I try to tune in to lots of guidance but can't get any clear feeling of what path I should take next. No signs like there should be. i think I am in a cosmic static. I don't want to always have difficult learning situations. Alice - Australia
Dana's response: A lot of people are experiencing a 'cosmic static' right now. As we jump from the old reality to the new not all of us jumps at the same time. So it is like some parts of us have jumped and landed, some parts are still in the old reality, and some have jumped and are flying through the air! Our new job, or relationship, or path can't fully be formed until all parts of us are ready and in place and so nearly everyone gets to the point where they feel in limbo, neither here nor there. This is a completely normal and natural part of the process. It won't last forever. The best thing to do if you are feeling no sense of which path to take is a) address any old beliefs or fears that may still be hanging on to the old reality as they cannot go with you to the new and b) have fun. This 'in between' state won't last forever and it is a perfect time to enjoy any downtime you have because you can be sure that a busier more full cycle is just up the road for you. So go to the beach, read a book, get a message, relax, stop 'trying' to move forward. Let it all go and just 'BE'.
The old reality was about learning the hard way (eg learning to step into your power after having to be abused or used first!). The new reality is about remembering who we are in joyful ways (eg stepping into our power because being in our power is who we really are). So no, you will not always have difficult learning situations and if you are still repeating difficult learning situations it is time to 'lift the needle' off that record. You don't have to learn that way anymore.
www.danamrkich.com
Dana's response: A lot of people are experiencing a 'cosmic static' right now. As we jump from the old reality to the new not all of us jumps at the same time. So it is like some parts of us have jumped and landed, some parts are still in the old reality, and some have jumped and are flying through the air! Our new job, or relationship, or path can't fully be formed until all parts of us are ready and in place and so nearly everyone gets to the point where they feel in limbo, neither here nor there. This is a completely normal and natural part of the process. It won't last forever. The best thing to do if you are feeling no sense of which path to take is a) address any old beliefs or fears that may still be hanging on to the old reality as they cannot go with you to the new and b) have fun. This 'in between' state won't last forever and it is a perfect time to enjoy any downtime you have because you can be sure that a busier more full cycle is just up the road for you. So go to the beach, read a book, get a message, relax, stop 'trying' to move forward. Let it all go and just 'BE'.
The old reality was about learning the hard way (eg learning to step into your power after having to be abused or used first!). The new reality is about remembering who we are in joyful ways (eg stepping into our power because being in our power is who we really are). So no, you will not always have difficult learning situations and if you are still repeating difficult learning situations it is time to 'lift the needle' off that record. You don't have to learn that way anymore.
www.danamrkich.com
What about when positive thinking does nothing to influence an outcome?
Q - I try to be aware of negative thoughts and create and attract abundance, however I seem to be going through a phase where certain situations around me that I am involved in but have little control over seem to be independent and resistant to positive influence. It is hard not to feel emotionally involved but I cannot change anything. I try to remain pleasant and beam love but it has no effect on the outcome. This seems to always occur with particular situations and people that have lots of triggers that create confusion no matter what you do. So how do you know the steps but nothing seems to influence the outcome? The closer the people are in the circle of relatives and family the harder it is not to feel a tug at the heart. Alice - Australia
Dana's response:
1) We cannot control the actions of other people. Relatives and family especially can push our buttons, and on a higher level that is one of the major reasons we chose to incarnate within a certain soul group. The buttons they push are aspects of our selves wanting to be strengthened, activated, brought to our attention etc. Anytime we are triggered by the actions of those around us, there is still something within us yet to be resolved. For example, if we have a critical sibling or parent the upset they cause us is letting us know that we are still allowing their thoughts and opinions about us to influence us more than we are allowing our own knowing about our own self to influence us. In certain extreme situations being constantly upset may be a sign that a particular person or relationship is not in alignment with you, and you may need to think about disconnecting from that relationship for a period of time, or permanently if appropriate.
2) When we think positively in order to create a positive outcome, it is important to realise that the best possible outcome is not always the outcome we had in mind. As I said above, sometimes a certain relationship is no longer in vibrational alignment with who we are, nor is it in alignment with where we are going. So the more 'positive' we are, the wider the gap becomes and the more difficult it is to be in that relationship. Tension may increase simply because it is like having two completely different radio signals trying to broadcast at the same time in the same room. Hence, if you are involved in a relationship that is currently existing on two different vibrational signals in order to have peace and harmony you either have to a) remove yourself for a period of time or b) both of you need to be conscious about the vibrational gap and try to understand where each other are coming from. In these changing times it will get increasingly harder to be involved in any relationship or situation where you are conscious and others are not.
3) Having a positive outlook isn't always for the purpose of changing the environment around you. It changes the way you see and perceive the environment around you, lessening the degree to which you are 'triggered' by things not in alignment with you.
http://www.danamrkich.com/
Dana's response:
1) We cannot control the actions of other people. Relatives and family especially can push our buttons, and on a higher level that is one of the major reasons we chose to incarnate within a certain soul group. The buttons they push are aspects of our selves wanting to be strengthened, activated, brought to our attention etc. Anytime we are triggered by the actions of those around us, there is still something within us yet to be resolved. For example, if we have a critical sibling or parent the upset they cause us is letting us know that we are still allowing their thoughts and opinions about us to influence us more than we are allowing our own knowing about our own self to influence us. In certain extreme situations being constantly upset may be a sign that a particular person or relationship is not in alignment with you, and you may need to think about disconnecting from that relationship for a period of time, or permanently if appropriate.
2) When we think positively in order to create a positive outcome, it is important to realise that the best possible outcome is not always the outcome we had in mind. As I said above, sometimes a certain relationship is no longer in vibrational alignment with who we are, nor is it in alignment with where we are going. So the more 'positive' we are, the wider the gap becomes and the more difficult it is to be in that relationship. Tension may increase simply because it is like having two completely different radio signals trying to broadcast at the same time in the same room. Hence, if you are involved in a relationship that is currently existing on two different vibrational signals in order to have peace and harmony you either have to a) remove yourself for a period of time or b) both of you need to be conscious about the vibrational gap and try to understand where each other are coming from. In these changing times it will get increasingly harder to be involved in any relationship or situation where you are conscious and others are not.
3) Having a positive outlook isn't always for the purpose of changing the environment around you. It changes the way you see and perceive the environment around you, lessening the degree to which you are 'triggered' by things not in alignment with you.
http://www.danamrkich.com/
When I ask for higher self guidance it feels like I'm making it up?
Q - I have been asking questions of my higher self and writing down the answers that I "get". I have no idea what I'm doing, but the writing just flows. It seems to come through more easily for me when I write. Of course, then I think, 'okay, this is all coming from my head, I am making it all up'. Whatever! Beautiful words of wisdom so full of compassion, support and love...who cares where it's coming from, right? Since I started doing these meditations I find myself having a dialogue in my head ongoing, throughout the day. I don't know who is talking, and often I feel I'm just talking to myself, but sometimes I feel really connected to something higher, more wise, more patient and kind. I'm not getting a very clear visual on my higher self. I have more of a sense of her, it is as if I can feel what it would be like to be more Her, even if only momentarily! - Stefania, USA
Dana's response: Writing is one of the best ways to connect with higher guidance, allowing insights and messages to flow through you, which is why I highly recommend daily journaling as an ongoing practice. There is something about writing that lets the mind get out of the way, allowing the soul and your innate wisdom to take over. I also say it's a way to check your emails from your higher self and guides, who otherwise have a hard time getting through to us with our daily mental chatter and general busy-ness. It is completely natural and normal to feel like you are making it up, simply because the info is coming from the exact same place our imagination comes from, the higher realms, a dimension that the logical mind can't quite understand. If the dialogue feels connected to something higher, more wise, more patient and kind then that is a good sign you are connected to your higher self and realms. Higher guidance always feel gentle and kind. It is the mind or ego that makes things up, usually feeling much more harsh and critical.
Don't worry too much about what your higher self looks like, it is her or his energy that you want to tap into, yes feeling what it would be like to embody more of that energy. Likewise don't worry too much about 'who' is talking when you do feel connected to higher guidance, be it during meditation or journaling. That is, we can get hung up on 'is this my higher self or guides or an angel?' when really the separation we know on this plane between individuals doesn't exist in the higher realms in quite the same way. Our higher self might answer one aspect of a question while our guides answer another aspect. Our guides often speak as, and are, a collective group, something that again is hard for the mind to grasp. Connection with your higher self and guides simply takes trust, trusting that you can open to divine guidance and trusting what comes. It sounds like you are already doing this, which is great! Just remember: higher guidance always feels good, comforting and positive, even when it means moving outside your familar comfort zones. If guidance doesn't feel right or good, ask that your higher self be with you immediately. Ask three times to be sure.
www.danamrkich.com
Dana's response: Writing is one of the best ways to connect with higher guidance, allowing insights and messages to flow through you, which is why I highly recommend daily journaling as an ongoing practice. There is something about writing that lets the mind get out of the way, allowing the soul and your innate wisdom to take over. I also say it's a way to check your emails from your higher self and guides, who otherwise have a hard time getting through to us with our daily mental chatter and general busy-ness. It is completely natural and normal to feel like you are making it up, simply because the info is coming from the exact same place our imagination comes from, the higher realms, a dimension that the logical mind can't quite understand. If the dialogue feels connected to something higher, more wise, more patient and kind then that is a good sign you are connected to your higher self and realms. Higher guidance always feel gentle and kind. It is the mind or ego that makes things up, usually feeling much more harsh and critical.
Don't worry too much about what your higher self looks like, it is her or his energy that you want to tap into, yes feeling what it would be like to embody more of that energy. Likewise don't worry too much about 'who' is talking when you do feel connected to higher guidance, be it during meditation or journaling. That is, we can get hung up on 'is this my higher self or guides or an angel?' when really the separation we know on this plane between individuals doesn't exist in the higher realms in quite the same way. Our higher self might answer one aspect of a question while our guides answer another aspect. Our guides often speak as, and are, a collective group, something that again is hard for the mind to grasp. Connection with your higher self and guides simply takes trust, trusting that you can open to divine guidance and trusting what comes. It sounds like you are already doing this, which is great! Just remember: higher guidance always feels good, comforting and positive, even when it means moving outside your familar comfort zones. If guidance doesn't feel right or good, ask that your higher self be with you immediately. Ask three times to be sure.
www.danamrkich.com
Does aligning with a desired reality mean denying actual reality?
Q. I find (aligning with your desired vibrational reality) tricky, because it feels like denial of current physical reality? - Sam, Australia
Dana's Response: It is often hard for people to visualise and feel a reality that isn't in their physical reality, because they feel they are denying their actual reality. However the acts of feeling or visualising what we want is not about denying 'actual reality'. It is about realising that our 'actual' reality is a much, much greater reality than our five senses can perceive, and that our current physical reality is only a small part of this reality. So rather than having one foot in one reality and the other foot in another reality (which implies there are 2 separate realities), a better way to think about it is to paraphrase the old parable about the three blind men who were asked to describe what an elephant looks like. One held his trunk and said an elephant is like a snake! The other patted his side and said 'It is like a wall'. The other held its tusk and said 'It is sharp like a sword'. None could see the whole elephant, thus the whole truth, the whole reality. So too, our physical reality is like the trunk or tusk of an elephant, meanwhile our whole reality is part of us too, albeit not visible to our physical eyes.
Our physical reality is just a result of the past content that has been filtering through our greater, vibrational reality, and if we want to change our physical reality the most powerful thing we can do is change our vibrational reality. It is no use manifesting anything on the physical if we haven't created it clearly on the spiritual, mental and emotional levels first because our creation will tend to either collapse or be created on a foundation not based on our authentic, aligned energy. So really, the physical shows us the results of our manifesting, but our actual manifesting happens on the non-physical planes. This will inevitably lead to a question about action: When our non-physical aspects are in alignment with our authentic being, then our actions are a natural, inspired progression of that alignment and are an enjoyable part of our life. When our non-physical aspects are not in alignment with our authentic being, our actions will usually feel like a lot of hard work and tend to not get us where we want to go, or get us there the hard way. We have been taught that 'hard work' gets us what we want, and that money won't just come out of thin air. My life experience has shown me that this is not true, and that 'magical living' is our divine birthright and something we all have a right to remember.
http://www.danamrkich.com/
Dana's Response: It is often hard for people to visualise and feel a reality that isn't in their physical reality, because they feel they are denying their actual reality. However the acts of feeling or visualising what we want is not about denying 'actual reality'. It is about realising that our 'actual' reality is a much, much greater reality than our five senses can perceive, and that our current physical reality is only a small part of this reality. So rather than having one foot in one reality and the other foot in another reality (which implies there are 2 separate realities), a better way to think about it is to paraphrase the old parable about the three blind men who were asked to describe what an elephant looks like. One held his trunk and said an elephant is like a snake! The other patted his side and said 'It is like a wall'. The other held its tusk and said 'It is sharp like a sword'. None could see the whole elephant, thus the whole truth, the whole reality. So too, our physical reality is like the trunk or tusk of an elephant, meanwhile our whole reality is part of us too, albeit not visible to our physical eyes.
Our physical reality is just a result of the past content that has been filtering through our greater, vibrational reality, and if we want to change our physical reality the most powerful thing we can do is change our vibrational reality. It is no use manifesting anything on the physical if we haven't created it clearly on the spiritual, mental and emotional levels first because our creation will tend to either collapse or be created on a foundation not based on our authentic, aligned energy. So really, the physical shows us the results of our manifesting, but our actual manifesting happens on the non-physical planes. This will inevitably lead to a question about action: When our non-physical aspects are in alignment with our authentic being, then our actions are a natural, inspired progression of that alignment and are an enjoyable part of our life. When our non-physical aspects are not in alignment with our authentic being, our actions will usually feel like a lot of hard work and tend to not get us where we want to go, or get us there the hard way. We have been taught that 'hard work' gets us what we want, and that money won't just come out of thin air. My life experience has shown me that this is not true, and that 'magical living' is our divine birthright and something we all have a right to remember.
http://www.danamrkich.com/
I feel guilty when I think about having it all
Q. One thing I'm a bit stuck on is the question how would I feel if I had all the things (be/do/have) that I wanted, and to watch if any negative feelings came up around that. Generally it felt awesome to imagine or 'see' where i wanted to be, do, have, but then when I stayed there for a bit longer I (at the beach with my soulmate and our children on the NSW north coast somewhere just frollicking on the weekend!), I suddenly felt very guilty and then looked around at other lonely people-a bit how I'm feeling now I suppose-and I felt extreme sympathy for them so that I couldn't enjoy what I had. So, why should I be able to have all that when they can't, or how can I just turn off to their hurt, pain, loneliness. I know that it doesn't help to 'join' with their lower vibration, but what about feeling the need to have others be ok so I can feel like it's ok for me to be blissfully happy as well. - Lisa, Australia
Dana's Response: Know that your example of happiness (in your vision and in your reality when your vision becomes real) serves to support other's visions. In seeing you be/do/have something it serves as an example that what you are doing is possible for them too. Anything and everything is possible for all beings, if they desire it from the space of their authentic being. When you are in a happy state you are in a much better position to then help others get to their happy state, whatever that means for them. I think one of the things that are feeling uncomfortable to you is the idea of being happy and selfish, or happy and self-centred in a non-caring way, but that is not what you have to be. You can be happy and giving and considerate and caring of others, compassionate and empathetic. It is all in the way that you are what you are!
Some good questions to ponder are: 1) In your vision you are feeling that the other 'lonely' people can't enjoy what you are having. This is indicating that there is some part of you that feels this way ie when you see people living your ideal 'dream', there is some 'lonely' part of you feeling you can't have that. Thus your lens of perception is coloured by that part when looking at others. Explore that part of you. Why do you feel you can't have it? When we see others living 'our dream' we can allow it to bring up all our 'stuff' - eg jealousy, resentment, loneliness, hurt, 'i can't do that/have that' - OR we can use it to inspire us: if it is possible for them, it is possible for me too! 2) Why do you associate being blissfully happy with turning off to the pain of others? We can be happy and have plenty of energy also for empathy, for compassion, for reaching out to others. Perhaps you have known those who are happy and in their own little world, but then there are those who are unhappy and in their own little world. A lot of us have these kinds of associations inside us eg having money means not caring about poor people or working 20 hours a day or not having enough time for family, but not all of these are true for every person with money. You want to create new associations in your mind, and thus release any old associations you have inside you that are likewise not necessarily true eg to truly be happy you have to turn off to any unhappiness around you or try to 'change' the unhappiness of others so that you can feel better about being happy. This leads to 3) Some part of you feels you need others around you to feel and be okay before you can feel and be okay. We can never, ever, ever, control how others feel. Ever. If we decide to make the happiness of others our 'okay' stick by which we then allow ourselves to be happy, we will certainly have a pretty unhappy life. We tend to have this pattern as a result of a rough childhood where we learned things like 'If I'm quiet enough/good enough then mum/dad won't be upset and they won't yell at each other/at me and I'll be okay'. This was our coping mechanism because we couldn't very well pack our bags and leave, but now as adults we can do two things. We can decide on the kind of inner environment we most enjoy being in, and we can decide on the kind of outer environment we most enjoy being in. While we can't change the mood of others, we can choose who we associate with, and make a conscious choice that we predominantly associate with happy, positive people. This isn't to say ignore your friend when she's having a sad day! Rather, there is a difference between positive people who go through the normal ups and downs of life, and negative people who more often than not are constantly saying or doing things that make you feel bad about yourself. When you were younger did you find yourself shifting your behaviour and emotions around a lot depending on what was going on around you, particularly with your parents? While this is normal for children, in extreme cases where there is a lot of tension in the home or other kinds of difficult circumstances, we forget to live from our authentic core inside, and are bopping around like a bouncing doll in reaction to what those around us do or don't do. Working on solar plexus/power related issues helps this.
www.danamrkich.com
Dana's Response: Know that your example of happiness (in your vision and in your reality when your vision becomes real) serves to support other's visions. In seeing you be/do/have something it serves as an example that what you are doing is possible for them too. Anything and everything is possible for all beings, if they desire it from the space of their authentic being. When you are in a happy state you are in a much better position to then help others get to their happy state, whatever that means for them. I think one of the things that are feeling uncomfortable to you is the idea of being happy and selfish, or happy and self-centred in a non-caring way, but that is not what you have to be. You can be happy and giving and considerate and caring of others, compassionate and empathetic. It is all in the way that you are what you are!
Some good questions to ponder are: 1) In your vision you are feeling that the other 'lonely' people can't enjoy what you are having. This is indicating that there is some part of you that feels this way ie when you see people living your ideal 'dream', there is some 'lonely' part of you feeling you can't have that. Thus your lens of perception is coloured by that part when looking at others. Explore that part of you. Why do you feel you can't have it? When we see others living 'our dream' we can allow it to bring up all our 'stuff' - eg jealousy, resentment, loneliness, hurt, 'i can't do that/have that' - OR we can use it to inspire us: if it is possible for them, it is possible for me too! 2) Why do you associate being blissfully happy with turning off to the pain of others? We can be happy and have plenty of energy also for empathy, for compassion, for reaching out to others. Perhaps you have known those who are happy and in their own little world, but then there are those who are unhappy and in their own little world. A lot of us have these kinds of associations inside us eg having money means not caring about poor people or working 20 hours a day or not having enough time for family, but not all of these are true for every person with money. You want to create new associations in your mind, and thus release any old associations you have inside you that are likewise not necessarily true eg to truly be happy you have to turn off to any unhappiness around you or try to 'change' the unhappiness of others so that you can feel better about being happy. This leads to 3) Some part of you feels you need others around you to feel and be okay before you can feel and be okay. We can never, ever, ever, control how others feel. Ever. If we decide to make the happiness of others our 'okay' stick by which we then allow ourselves to be happy, we will certainly have a pretty unhappy life. We tend to have this pattern as a result of a rough childhood where we learned things like 'If I'm quiet enough/good enough then mum/dad won't be upset and they won't yell at each other/at me and I'll be okay'. This was our coping mechanism because we couldn't very well pack our bags and leave, but now as adults we can do two things. We can decide on the kind of inner environment we most enjoy being in, and we can decide on the kind of outer environment we most enjoy being in. While we can't change the mood of others, we can choose who we associate with, and make a conscious choice that we predominantly associate with happy, positive people. This isn't to say ignore your friend when she's having a sad day! Rather, there is a difference between positive people who go through the normal ups and downs of life, and negative people who more often than not are constantly saying or doing things that make you feel bad about yourself. When you were younger did you find yourself shifting your behaviour and emotions around a lot depending on what was going on around you, particularly with your parents? While this is normal for children, in extreme cases where there is a lot of tension in the home or other kinds of difficult circumstances, we forget to live from our authentic core inside, and are bopping around like a bouncing doll in reaction to what those around us do or don't do. Working on solar plexus/power related issues helps this.
www.danamrkich.com
I have a block around age
Q - I seem to have a real block in my belief system around 'age'. I have a real block around this because I feel that I, at age 26, somehow don't or can't create success because I'm not young enough, I don't have 'permission'. I remember feeling like this when I was 19! My guides tell me it is not an age issue but that I am comparing myself to others issue. - Holly, Australia
Dana's response - So many people have this 'I'm too old/I'm not young enough' issue, and it doesn't matter if you are 19, 26, 40 or 67! Our critical voice inside uses any number of things to tell us why we can't do this or that, or berates us about why we haven't yet done something, or compares us to others in a negative way. There are lots of external societal factors that influence this, as well as cellular/ancestral DNA factors, however ultimately you have two choices: to keep listening to this critical voice, or to know you have a choice to ignore it! You don't have to listen to this voice, let alone believe it. It's time for a tough love question: Who runs the show that is your life? Your critical voice (run by your ego) or your authentic self? You have to choose, otherwise you will live a constant tug o war battle between the two, and spend the rest of your life feeling you are not young enough/good enough/successful enough/anything enough. The critical ego voice will always find a way to make you feel 'wrong' and one day you have to decide you are going to stand up for yourself from now on and put that voice in its place. It is a daily thing at first, to notice when this critical voice pipes in with his or her two cents worth. You have to be vigilant and find a way to automatically switch to a more positive thought or feeling when you notice this voice. Eventually your authentic voice will become the more dominant one. It takes time and practice, but the alternative is to keep living under the thumb (and limitations) of your ego self, and you well know the physical, mental and emotional consequences of that - it doesn't feel good!
www.danamrkich.com
Dana's response - So many people have this 'I'm too old/I'm not young enough' issue, and it doesn't matter if you are 19, 26, 40 or 67! Our critical voice inside uses any number of things to tell us why we can't do this or that, or berates us about why we haven't yet done something, or compares us to others in a negative way. There are lots of external societal factors that influence this, as well as cellular/ancestral DNA factors, however ultimately you have two choices: to keep listening to this critical voice, or to know you have a choice to ignore it! You don't have to listen to this voice, let alone believe it. It's time for a tough love question: Who runs the show that is your life? Your critical voice (run by your ego) or your authentic self? You have to choose, otherwise you will live a constant tug o war battle between the two, and spend the rest of your life feeling you are not young enough/good enough/successful enough/anything enough. The critical ego voice will always find a way to make you feel 'wrong' and one day you have to decide you are going to stand up for yourself from now on and put that voice in its place. It is a daily thing at first, to notice when this critical voice pipes in with his or her two cents worth. You have to be vigilant and find a way to automatically switch to a more positive thought or feeling when you notice this voice. Eventually your authentic voice will become the more dominant one. It takes time and practice, but the alternative is to keep living under the thumb (and limitations) of your ego self, and you well know the physical, mental and emotional consequences of that - it doesn't feel good!
www.danamrkich.com
How do I fit all my practices into my daily routine?
Q - One of my biggest problems is there are so many practices I feel I should be doing each day that I have never gotten into a routine that fits them all in, so I end up doing hardly any. I am wondering if you have any suggestions or routines that you find have worked for you over the years? - Amber, Australia
Dana's response: I would definitely suggest starting with one thing at a time. For years I had an ideal of my perfect morning routine and was never able to accomplish it all. For me, it has been a gradual process of slowly adding things. I have journalled since I was 11, so that was easy. I eventually got into a work out routine I enjoyed. It took until I was nearly 36 to get into a daily 15 min meditation. I do all those things most mornings in between shower and breakfast, before I do anything else. At night before I go to sleep I give thanks for everything that happened that day and say some prayers for anyone I know who is going through something challenging. Life is always changing, and there are times when the routine doesn't happen due to location or other circumstance. It is important to be flexible with yourself and relaxed with the ideal of sticking to a routine. It's like the difference between creating a healthy lifestyle where you have the odd piece of chocolate cake, or rigorously dieting then getting angry with yourself just because you skipped a day and end up eating the whole cake out of frustration. Rigid rules imposed on the self will never work because the self loves freedom, so all your practices have to be ones you genuinely feel to do and want to do, not ones you feel you 'should' do. Pick one thing that you genuinely are really yearning to have as your daily routine and go from there.
www.danamrkich.com
Dana's response: I would definitely suggest starting with one thing at a time. For years I had an ideal of my perfect morning routine and was never able to accomplish it all. For me, it has been a gradual process of slowly adding things. I have journalled since I was 11, so that was easy. I eventually got into a work out routine I enjoyed. It took until I was nearly 36 to get into a daily 15 min meditation. I do all those things most mornings in between shower and breakfast, before I do anything else. At night before I go to sleep I give thanks for everything that happened that day and say some prayers for anyone I know who is going through something challenging. Life is always changing, and there are times when the routine doesn't happen due to location or other circumstance. It is important to be flexible with yourself and relaxed with the ideal of sticking to a routine. It's like the difference between creating a healthy lifestyle where you have the odd piece of chocolate cake, or rigorously dieting then getting angry with yourself just because you skipped a day and end up eating the whole cake out of frustration. Rigid rules imposed on the self will never work because the self loves freedom, so all your practices have to be ones you genuinely feel to do and want to do, not ones you feel you 'should' do. Pick one thing that you genuinely are really yearning to have as your daily routine and go from there.
www.danamrkich.com
How long to spend visualising desires a day?
Q - How long do you suggest we spend each day just visualising our desires? - Bethany, Australia
Dana's response: I spend about 1 minute either during my morning meditation or when I stop at the beach during my morning walk, giving thanks for every life area eg health, relationships, work, finances, my home, travels etc. If there is any particular thing I am wanting to move more toward be it the publishing of my new book or a trip to a certain place, I give thanks for that too as I'm covering that life area. I have written 'what I want to manifest' lists as long as I can remember, usually at the beginning of every year. It doesn't mean that what I've wanted has happened in that year, but consistently having a vision of what I would like in my life has definitely steered my energy toward the fulfilment of those visions over time, most often in ways I never imagined or could possibly have orchestrated consciously.
www.danamrkich.com
Dana's response: I spend about 1 minute either during my morning meditation or when I stop at the beach during my morning walk, giving thanks for every life area eg health, relationships, work, finances, my home, travels etc. If there is any particular thing I am wanting to move more toward be it the publishing of my new book or a trip to a certain place, I give thanks for that too as I'm covering that life area. I have written 'what I want to manifest' lists as long as I can remember, usually at the beginning of every year. It doesn't mean that what I've wanted has happened in that year, but consistently having a vision of what I would like in my life has definitely steered my energy toward the fulfilment of those visions over time, most often in ways I never imagined or could possibly have orchestrated consciously.
www.danamrkich.com
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